(Abbey at 1 yrs old)
I don't know why but I've been feeling down the last few days. Maybe it's the weather? It's been cloudy and dreary (really, I don't have Seasonal Affect Disorder) Maybe it's because I
quit cold turkey? Maybe it's the hormones? Who knows?!
I had a little bit of an emotional breakdown last night. I was feeling a little inadequate because I couldn't keep my house clean. I felt like my husband didn't love me enough (romance is not his forte). I kept thinking, what if this cycle doesn't work? How many more cycles can I endure? What if I'm not qualified to have babies? Needless to say, it was a long night. With each passing day, I am getting more and more anxious. But I keep praying (A LOT) that the Lord will bless me with strength to accept whatever it is that is to come. And that's all I can really do. Pray for peace. Pray for comfort. Pray for strength.
*Update* - Literally, five minutes after I posted this, the nurse from the RE's office called and told me that the other embryo's did not survive long enough to be frozen. I was sad to hear that and it made me tear up a little bit, but I pulled myself together. I feel like I'm on the brink of another cry fest. Holding it all back though.
